You, Inc: The Art of Selling Yourself

The book consists of more than 100 short case studies that illustrate various points, all returning to a single loose theme: that the art of life is the art of the sale. Each one forms a kind of lesson, ending in a single bold-face sentence that summarizes its content.

Like a book of fables, this collection need not be read from cover to cover, but can be dipped into at random. Even by devoting just a few minutes at a time to it, you can gain plenty of wisdom. But beware of placing it on your bedside table. It's written in such an entertaining manner, that you might find yourself reading it until the wee small hours of the morning.

The book's lessons are grouped into eight chapters. The first one is "What people buy," and it sets the stage for the book. "What people buy," it turns out, is you – whether you're selling life insurance, applying for graduate school, or trying to get friends to choose the movie that you want to see. In other words, to live well is to sell well, and to sell well is to offer the best product possible. And since your real product is you, a bit of self-improvement is in order.

And by that, the authors don't just mean sharpen your skills, although skills are important. It's also important to work on your attitude. The role that this kind of softer career skill plays is a key theme at Mind Tools, and the authors are right to emphasize it. They give an example to make this point: Let's say you're an incredibly skilled actor, clearly the best one at the audition. Despite this, there's no guarantee you'll get the big part. Are you a bear to work with? Does pessimism cloud your interactions? If so, you'll probably have trouble selling yourself to the director, no matter how effective an actor you are.

According to the authors, experienced sales people know that. On meeting a new prospect, a good salesman doesn't start talking about his great product. First he sells himself and his organization, and then he discusses the product. Only at the very end does he make his pitch: "Let's talk about how little this costs, considering everything you'll get." If the prospect doesn't buy the salesman, the product will flop, regardless of its merits.

Having established the importance of selling yourself, the authors switch to how to do so. The first step, and the topic of the next three chapters, is planning. First, they challenge the conventional wisdom about goals. "Find your motivation in something other than goals," they advise. Mind Tools readers are familiar with what goal setting can achieve, and will wonder why the authors say this. Their argument is that when we're motivated solely by goals, we can find ourselves charging so hard in one direction that we lose sight of other possibilities. Rather than focus your vision on goals, they suggest doing what you love, and then being open to the possibilities that arise.

To illustrate the point, one of the authors recounts her own experience as a cartoon artist. She never consciously aspired to be a cartoon artist. She was a successful sales manager for a leading marketing consultancy when breast cancer struck in nineteen-ninety-four. A month after surgery, 50 cancer-related cartoons took shape in her head, full of humorous messages to help people get through the trauma of cancer. As she moved through chemotherapy, she kept her focus on the cartoons, searching for humor amid the struggle. A year later, she used her considerable sales skills to land a contract for not one but two books on using humor to cope with cancer. Suddenly, a person who had focused her energy on being a top salesperson had emerged as an author as well – without the aid of a goal.

While this is certainly a fascinating case of unplanned success, it doesn't mean that goal-setting doesn't also lead to success – and more reliably at that. All of the Mind Tools resources on goal-setting encourage you to choose goals that relate to high-priority areas in your life, so that you're naturally motivated to work toward them. And if you review your goals regularly, and abandon the ones that have become irrelevant or unimportant, while also looking in all areas of your life for new goals, there's not much chance that you'll miss golden opportunities by being totally focused on a single goal.

But however you're motivated, what next for the corporation that is You, Inc.? Well, it's time to refine the message being put forth by the "brand called you." The first question is fundamental: Who are you? To sell yourself, you need a story – a true one, of course – that describes the path you're on and motivates people to be interested. The authors suggest taking a cue from the marketing trade. Expert marketers are good at finding a company's forgotten, ignored, or overlooked stories, and bringing them to life. "Find your story," the authors advise. "And tell it well."

From there, they advise putting real energy into developing an effective answer to that expected cocktail-party question, "What do you do?" You need a straightforward, compelling answer, preferably one with an image attached to it. The authors suggest writing down your best answer and showing it to four people you trust. Ask them if the answer is clear? Is it simple? Does it make you look focused enough to have mastered your craft? If not, refine and revise it – no one trusts a jack of all trades to do excellent work in any one of them.

Once you've refined your story, it's time to focus on how other people see you. Like it or not, people we meet tend to use shorthand markers to categorize us. In other words, stereotypes are alive and well – and you must be prepared to deal with them. The authors turn again to their own experience. Author Harry Beckwith trained as a lawyer – something he never expected would negatively affect his marketing career. Years ago, he presented a marketing plan to Apple Computer, which was looking for help with a new product. Beckwith and his team dazzled the Apple execs with their strategy, and left the meeting assuming they would win the job. But they didn't.

Weeks later, they asked why. "We loved the work," the Apple exec replied. "It's just that Harry is a lawyer, and lawyers can't be creative." Thus the authors suggest preparing yourself for the stereotypes you might unwittingly put forth, and work hard to dispel them. How to do so? One way is by dressing against stereotype. To shake a boring-lawyer image, lose the tie and wear a bold shirt. If you're an artist liable to be stereotyped as unreliable, do the opposite: wear a tailored suit with a "power" tie.

For the next chapter, the authors turn to that key facet of the information age, written communication. The authors point out that, as information technologies have expanded, the face-to-face meeting has become less important in the business world. The "power lunch" is giving way to the Power Note, Power Memo, and Power Proposal. Got a good idea? Well, you'll probably be asked to email it to your target. But can you write well enough? The authors offer loads of advice, which can be boiled down to two words: "simplify" and "clarify."

The authors argue forcefully that when it comes to writing, less is more. People tend to overload their proposals with all manner of detail, trying to make an overwhelming case for their idea. Instead, they merely overwhelm their readers, and their idea gets lost in the process.

Another bit of advice is: beware of using gimmicks. All too often, ideas that seem cute and funny fall with a thud on their targets. Instead of making you seem clever, wordplay, bad puns, and tricks will likely make it appear like you have nothing important to say. They may even insult your readers, who may think you view them as unsophisticated and easily fooled. If you worry, "Is my idea unprofessional?", it probably is.

Rather than gimmicks, the authors suggest, focus your writing efforts around the oldest communication tool in the world: a good story. You'll notice a theme emerging here! All over the globe and across time, good stories share two key elements: a hero and a challenge. The way the hero confronts the challenge, and what he learns from it, are what grab our attention. But there's one more trick: No matter how riveting the action, people don't really get into a story unless they can identify with its hero.

So, when trying to convince someone to take a particular action, cast them in the role of hero. The challenge will be whatever problem you're telling them you can solve. In the story, what the hero learns is that your solution worked best. And this applies whether you're selling yourself as a job prospect, selling a piece of real estate to a client, or merely trying to get your way in a strategy meeting.

After their thorough discussion of written communication, the authors turn to two other forms: listening and speaking. Listening, they say, turns out to be a key skill for selling yourself. People want to be heard, and appreciate someone who listens. Often, however, we're so eager to get our message across that we functionally ignore what the other person is saying, obviously waiting for them to stop so we can speak up.

That's unfortunate for two reasons. First, how can we craft our message to suit someone if we don't know them, and how can we know them if we don't listen? Second, our poor listening skills will be obvious, and will send the message that we only care about our own concerns. In fact, the authors say, the surest way to get labeled "fascinating" at a cocktail party is to listen intently to the chatter of others.

Clearly, really listening to what others say requires discipline. How to develop it? The authors suggest imposing a one-second rule on yourself. When someone is speaking to you one-on-one, focus on what they're saying – and wait one second after they finish before you reply. This lets them know that they have a real listener on their hands – and forces you to come up with a response that takes their concerns to heart. They will feel heard – and that will make them like you – or, to use the authors' language, buy you.

Next the authors turn to speaking – which even in the information age remains a key communication method for getting your message out. When speaking publicly, they say, the goal shouldn't be to convince your audience, but rather to motivate them. Someone who lays out an air-tight case for buying a product or performing some action might leave the crowd impressed, and nodding their heads in agreement. But when that person has gone, the audience will likely go back to business as usual. Why? Because the speaker didn't motivate them – he didn't move them.

The main way to achieve a truly motivational presentation is to say only things you truly believe, say them with conviction, and put them as simply and clearly as you can. In speaking, as in writing, the authors coach us to be brief – cut the boring bits, the parts that allow people to day dream. Want to write a great 10-minute speech? Write a 20-minute speech, then cut out the weakest stories and the unnecessary words. Now look at your ten-minute speech. Challenge yourself to lop another minute off. This will add intensity and energy to your presentation – and give the impression that you're organized, succinct, confident, and respectful of people's time.

As for PowerPoint, the authors see it as an overused crutch – a substitute for real clarity and passion in a presentation. Want to suck the air out of the room? Present a bunch of PowerPoint slides full of pie charts and text blocks showing "the five elements" of this, and the "four keys" to that. Study after study show that such presentations don't motivate people to act – more likely, they motivate people to make post-presentation grocery lists. People respond to your conviction, not your mastery of the bells and whistles of a computer program. Use PowerPoint to fill in visual gaps with striking images, but don't abuse it.

The next chapter, "On tactics and habits," serves as a kind of catch-all for a variety of advice on everything from clothes to business cards and gossip. In short, men should have at least one dark, tailored suit, with a well-made pair of black lace-up shoes to match. Business cards should be simple but distinctive – they're often your last chance to make an impression. As for gossip, just don't do it. Accentuate the positive among colleagues and associates, and stay above petty squabbles.

This chapter also offers an effective tool for remembering people's names – that ever-difficult task. When you meet someone new, try to link their name to an image related to them. When you meet someone named Jim who looks fit, think of "gym" as in "gymnasium." Tom can be translated into the image of a "Tomcat." Celebrities also work. A Julia with a big smile can become "Julia Roberts," while an athletic David can become, for memory's sake, "Beckham." Try to remember the image they inspire – and the name will follow.

The book ends with success stories that drive the authors' points home, including their own personal triumphs in selling themselves. These informal case studies reveal the importance of the little things – communicating effectively, listening well, and presenting an attractive image to the outside world.

Among sales teams, there's a common command: A-B-C, Always Be Closing. You, Inc. gives that mantra a twist: Always Be Charming. Present a genuinely charming, professional persona to the world, and deals will close on favorable terms – all kinds of deals, not just business ones.

You Inc. by Harry Beckwith and Christine Clifford Beckwith is published in hardback by Random House.

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