Breaking Bad Habits

Chances are, you have a bad habit that you'd like to beat. It could be overeating, excessive screen time, not getting enough sleep, saying "yes" too often, missing deadlines, procrastinating, breaking promises, or giving in to anger, for example.

At first, these behaviors may not bother you. But, eventually, you reach a breaking point where "enough is enough." Maybe your habit is starting to impact your co-workers or your family. Or, perhaps you suddenly realize that your habit is preventing you from achieving your career goals. Whatever the reason, there's no bad time to break a bad habit.

The nine strategies below will help you to get started, but bear in mind that there's no "one size fits all" approach: you'll likely need a combination of tactics.

1. Identify the Causes of Your Habit

Take time to examine your habit. Ask yourself when the behavior usually occurs, who you're with, what happens, how you feel, and the "payoff" that you get when you do it.

Often, bad habits develop because we perceive that they bring some benefit to our lives. For example, some people smoke or overeat because it helps them to combat stress. Other habits develop from social or cultural expectations. The habit of rejecting compliments, for example, is common in western cultures because people see it as the "polite" thing to do.

Understanding why a habit formed will help you to tackle it in the most appropriate way.

2. Increase Your Self-Awareness

Consider what you need to do, or how you could change your circumstances, to give yourself the best chance to kick your habit.

In her book, "Better Than Before," Gretchen Rubin suggests that to do this, we need to identify our "dominant tendency" – the way that we respond to pressures like deadlines, requests and decision making.

According to Rubin, each of us tends to be either an Upholder, a Questioner, an Obliger, or a Rebel. Each tendency has different needs when breaking a bad habit.

Upholders need to make a conscious decision to change. Questioners need information about the impact of their habit. Obligers need someone to hold them accountable. And Rebels need to make changes on their own terms.

To identify your tendency, take Rubin's Four Tendencies Quiz (this is free, but requires you to enter your email address).

3. Choose the Right Approach

To identify the right tactics for breaking or changing a habit, you need to know what works for you as an individual.

You can pin down your personal preferences by using another concept from Rubin's book – the "strategy of distinctions." This reveals how different people like to approach tasks. You might, for instance:

• Prefer novelty or familiarity.
• Be a moderator ("I can just cut back on something"), or an abstainer ("I need to cut it out completely").
• Prefer simplicity or abundance.
• Be an opener ("I like starting projects but struggle to complete them") or a finisher ("I like to get things done").
• Be an early bird or a night owl.

If you like novelty, for example, and you want to change your diet, you'll likely be more successful if you regularly add some new dishes to your menu. But, if you prefer familiarity, sticking to a weekly meal plan will be a better approach.

Your preferences might vary according to the habit that you're trying to break, so finding your style may involve some trial and error.

4. Make a Plan

Studies suggest that conscious planning can make it easier to overcome bad habits.

A good way to do this is to build habit-breaking into a program of Personal Goal Setting. This ensures that you review your progress regularly, and that you prioritize your most damaging habits.

When you have a plan, you can also add prompts and milestones into a To-Do List or Action Program.

5. Monitor Your Actions and Emotions

Research shows that monitoring your own behavior is essential for breaking bad habits.

Journaling is a great way to do this. If you're quitting smoking, for example, make a note of every successful day without a cigarette. Watching your progress in this way can be highly motivating. But log the times when you didn't succeed, too, and your thoughts and feelings throughout the process. This can reveal the behaviors or situations that trigger your habit.

When you've identified those negative behaviors, you can begin to swap them for more positive ones (see Use Obstacles and Replacements, below). But be realistic, and don't expect instant results: it takes an average of 66 days for a new behavior to become a new habit. If you experience a few setbacks along the way, making a note of them allows you to learn from your mistakes.

6. Use Obstacles and Replacements

In his 2010 book, "The Happiness Advantage," positive psychologist Shawn Achor argues that you can break bad habits by putting obstacles in place that stop you from automatically carrying out the behavior. For example, if you find yourself repeatedly checking Twitter, you could block your access with an app.

You can also make an effort to avoid the people, places and situations that trigger your bad habit. Say, for instance, that you want to stop gossiping at work. You know that you gossip most during lunch with particular colleagues, so you resolve to eat at a different time, with different people.

You can also look for positive behaviors that replace the negative ones. For this to work, the replacement must address the underlying "benefit" or "payoff" that you get from your habit.

For example, if you want to stop criticizing people, flip the same behavior around and try praising them instead. Or, if your goal is to stop checking your email during meetings, offer to chair the meeting or take detailed minutes, to keep yourself occupied.

7. Find a Role Model

Look for someone who has broken a habit like yours, and has reaped the rewards. This shows you that it's possible and worthwhile to break your own.

Choose someone you like and admire. If it's someone you know, ask them how they did it. You could even ask them to coach or mentor you while your work through your habit. Alternatively, it could be a celebrity or business leader. If so, check whether they've written a memoir, or seek out interviews online.

8. Reward Yourself

As you start to beat your habit, give yourself a little treat once in a while so that you feel good about the progress you're making.

Rewards are most effective when they come soon after the positive behavior. Choose something that you truly want and will enjoy. Over time, your brain can start to associate your new, positive behavior with the reward, and this will reinforce your new "good" habit.

9. Involve Others

Finally, consider asking co-workers, family members or friends to help you to stay on track.

Share your goals with them, and ask them to tell you if they notice you slipping back into your old ways. This will provide further accountability and boost your motivation.

If you're not ready to involve those close to you, join a support group or an online forum. Communicating with people who have similar goals, and who can offer encouragement, will keep you motivated if things get tough.

Breaking Bad Habits Infographic

See how you can break bad habits with our infographic.

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