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Humility
The Most Beautiful Word in the English Language
By Bruna Martinuzzi
Many years ago, one of my university
professors mentioned that "windowsill" was voted the most
beautiful word in the English language. Being an armchair
linguist, this factoid naturally stayed with me. Words have
enormous power. They can make us erupt into laughter or bring
tears to our eyes. They can influence, inspire, manipulate and
shock. They can build and destroy. Some words have different
effects on different people. One such word is humility. It is one
of those words that are seldom in neutral gear. Some, like me,
love the word and all it stands for. Some almost fear it and
interpret it synonymously with lack of self-confidence or
timidity.
The dictionary defines humility as modesty, lacking pretence, not believing that
you are superior to others. An ancillary definition includes: "Having a
lowly opinion of oneself, meekness". The word "humility" first
struck me in the context of leadership when Jim Collins mentioned
it in his seminal work
Good to Great: Why Some Companies Make the Leap... and Others
Don't. In this book, Collins examined companies that went from
good to great by sustaining 15-year cumulative stock returns at or
below the general stock market, and after a transition point,
cumulative returns at least three times the market over the next
15 years.
Among the many characteristics that distinguished these companies
from others is that they all had a Level 5 leader. Level 5 leaders
direct their ego away from themselves to the larger goal of
leading their company to greatness. These leaders are a complex,
paradoxical mix of intense professional will and extreme personal
humility. They will create superb results but shun public
adulation, and are never boastful. They are described as modest.
An example of such a leader who epitomized humility is David
Packard, the co-founder of Hewlett-Packard, who, in Jim Collins'
words, defined himself as a HP man first and a CEO second. He was
a man of the people, practicing management by walking around.
Shunning all manner of publicity, Packard is quoted as saying:
"You shouldn't gloat about anything you've done; you ought to keep
going and find something better to do."
Another great leader is Patrick Daniel, CEO of North American
energy and pipeline company Enbridge, who espouses two leadership
attributes: determination to create results and humility, shifting
the focus away from himself and continually recognizing the
contributions of others. "I have learned through the lives of
great leaders," he said, "that greatness comes from humility and
being at times, self-effacing."
Clearly these leaders, and many others like them, don't espouse
the meaning of humility as "meek". On the contrary, it is a source
of their strength. But the notion of being self-effacing is one
that we struggle with in our competitive culture, prescribing that
we take every opportunity to toot our own horn, and that we don't
dare leave the house without our dynamic elevator speech all
rehearsed.
We often confuse humility with timidity. Humility is not clothing
ourselves in an attitude of self-abasement or self-denigration.
Humility is all about maintaining our pride about who we are,
about our achievements, about our worth - but without arrogance -
it is the antithesis of hubris, that excessive, arrogant pride
which often leads to the derailment of some corporate heroes, as
it does with the downfall of the tragic hero in Greek drama. It's
about a quiet confidence without the need for a meretricious
selling of our wares. It's about being content to let others
discover the layers of our talents without having to boast about
them. It's a lack of arrogance, not a lack of aggressiveness in
the pursuit of achievement.
An interesting dichotomy is that, often, the higher people rise,
the more they have accomplished, the higher the humility index.
Those who achieve the most brag the least, and the more secure
they are in themselves, the more humble they are. "True merit,
like a river, the deeper it is, the less noise it makes". (Edward
Frederick Halifax). We have all come across people like that and
feel admiration for them.
There is also an understated humility of every day people we work
with who have the ability to get the job done without drawing
attention to themselves. Witness the employee who is working at
his computer into the late hours, purely motivated by a keen sense
of duty, the executive assistant who stays after 5:30pm on a
Friday night in an empty office to await a courier, or the manager
who quietly cancels an important personal event to fly out of town
to attend to the company's business. This is akin to the
philanthropist who gives an anonymous donation.
Humility is also a meta-virtue. It crosses into an array of
principles. For example, we can safely declare that there cannot
be authenticity without humility. Why? Because, there is always a
time in a leader's journey when one will be in a situation of not
having all the answers. Admitting this and seeking others' input
requires some humility.
Another mark of a leader who practices humility is his or her
treatment of others. Such leaders treat everyone with respect
regardless of position. Years ago, I came across this reference:
the sign of a gentleman is how he treats those who can be of
absolutely no use to him.
Something interesting happens, too, when we approach situations
from a perspective of humility: it opens us up to possibilities,
as we choose open-mindedness and curiosity over protecting our
point of view. We spend more time in that wonderful space of the
beginner's mind, willing to learn from what others have to offer.
We move away from pushing into allowing, from insecure to secure,
from seeking approval to seeking enlightenment. We forget about
being perfect and we enjoy being in the moment.
Here are a few suggestions on practicing humility:
-
There are times when swallowing one's pride is
particularly difficult and any intentions of humility fly out the
window, as we get engaged in a contest of perfection, each side
seeking to look good. If you find yourself in such no-win
situations, consider developing some strategies to ensure that the
circumstances don't lead you to lose your grace. Try this
sometimes: just stop talking and allow the other person to be in
the limelight. There is something very liberating in this
strategy.
- Here are three magical words that will produce more peace of
mind than a week at an expensive retreat: "You are right."
- Catch yourself if you benignly slip into over preaching or
coaching without permission - is zeal to impose your point of view
overtaking discretion? Is your correction of others reflective of
your own needs?
- Seek others' input on how you are showing up in your leadership
path. Ask: "How am I doing?" It takes humility to ask such a
question. And even more humility to consider the answer.
- Encourage the practice of humility in your company through your
own example: every time you share credit for successes with
others, you reinforce the ethos for your constituents. Consider
mentoring or coaching emerging leaders on this key attribute of
leadership.
There are many benefits to practicing
humility, to being in a state of non-pretence: it improves
relationships across all levels, it reduces anxiety, it encourages
more openness and paradoxically, it enhances one's
self-confidence. It opens a window to a higher self. For me, it
replaces "windowsill" as the most beautiful word in the English
language.
Copyright © 2006-2007 by Bruna Martinuzzi. All Rights Reserved.
Based in British Columbia, Bruna is the President and Founder of
Clarion Enterprises Ltd, a company which specializes in emotional
intelligence and leadership training. Click
here to contact her
or visit her website at
www.increaseyoureq.com.
Spread the Word:
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A full list of Mind Tools articles is available here.
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